Are you aware that patterns of hurt are perpetuated long after they are relevant:
We do this through thoughts and phrases which we repeat internally or externally, essentially little mantra’s which we tell ourselves about the world
“its always like this” … “I am not loved” … “I’m alone in this world” “I am…” “he/she is…”
It is necessary to reinforce and maintain these beliefs in order for the pattern to survive and this is done by repetition.
Most often some real traumatic event could have started this pattern but it will then run regardless of how true it is if left unchecked.
These patterns also reinforce themselves through self fulfilling prophecies – creating and attracting situations and people who will then then prove the pattern to be “true” – it’s understandable as the pattern has a survival mechanism of its own considers itself to be true – it is looking out for you as best it knows how…
A way to see and change these patterns is to be mindful of your thoughts, notice words and phrases you repeat most often to yourself and others in your speach. How do they make you feel in your body? Quite often these phrases have become condensed so when spoken they come out all together as one tight bunch. They might have become so condensed and tight that they start to have a weight and physical reality (in neural networks atleast 😉 ).
We can free up these tight concepts, however, unpicking and opening up the pattern to find spaciousness itself. The tool to do this is awareness:
“Start to catch yourself as you repeat them, notice them more and more often as they arise and without needing to fight or repress them (they are not the enemy), just thank them for doing what they thought to be best for you and relax. Allow them to sink back into your heart and take a deep breath which will open and give space to these tight ideas. Have the courage to really feel the hurt and emotions that underly the pattern (actually it is this pain they were protecting us from) – cry, scream, shout if the energy comes to do so, but don’t throw out this pain (there are gems there in it for you), bring it right into your heart and feel it, love it as you would a hurt child. If you notice yourself getting distracted away from the feeling by the ideas around it then repeat breathing it into your heart and allowing the underlying feeling.
As we continue to breath and the pattens relax and open, inspiration and novelty begins to enter – suddenly other possibilities and outcomes we had never even dreamed of become visible and clear, a lightness and joy starts to fill our being as we see life as a wonderful mystery again – not some heavy inevitabe noose that has been placed around our necks. Breathe this energy down into your body to your belly and genitals – there might be something for you to do, some real situations that need changing. We are not spiritually bypassing here with positive affirmations that merely placate us on the surface whilst deep down we remain in turmoil. We are feeling our hurts and reclaiming our energy from these patterns in order to live more and more deeply from our most juicy desires (lets call this listening to god..). Allow yourself to feel excited by life.
We have a choice in each and every moment to be aware and to choose what kind of thoughts we want to believe – it takes us out of the position of simply being victims of this world, and turns us into Gods and Goddesses alive and present in the mystery.
Empower yourself with choice 🙂